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Why Youth Today Are Confused

  • 25 March 2010

We do our youth a great injustice when we neglect to teach them that their outside appearance does not represent who they are internally. Society teaches them that, if they are not beautiful, they will get no where in life. They need to know that this is a lie and that their character is what people admire about them.

Girls nowadays will do pretty much anything to make themselves acceptable to boys. Boys don’t seem to understand that there are limits for what they should expect from girls. Of course, this behavior is not new, but what is new is the way girls try to please boys today.

We don’t just have girls giving away chastity to be popular, we have them doing things that no child or teen should be doing. Not only do they give away sex, but they participate in parties like none I ever attended. Even in restrooms at school, they are caught doing things we wouldn’t dream of when I was a teen.

Why Are We Surprised?

We may be appalled by the behavior of our society today.  We may also be very surprised by the degree of it!  Did we not teach our children the right way to show love and how to give boys proper attention? Perhaps we just assume that they understand and then act surprised (even shocked) when they do some of the things we see them do?

If we didn’t teach them the values, limits, and boundaries that sex carries with it, and we didn’t teach them by our examples, then what else can we expect from them? Often, we leave that duty up to the churches and schools, even though the schools and churches have fallen down on this responsibility…just as we parents have fallen down on our duties to teach children.

Parents Face An Uphill Battle

We may be responsible parents and teach our children correctly but they still fall victim to society.  Children become victims because they were not strong enough to resist the compelling influences that besiege them. Also, they may not fully understand that this is a war for their right to be happy and to be safe from the harmful repercussions that follow life’s challenges.

Parents today are fighting an uphill battle as well and so our children often become products of society’s ungodly influences. The way I see it, children either have not been taught the boundaries of healthy sex or they become part of a sick society because they are not surrounded by healthy influences or developed the tools they need to succesfully fight these influences.

It is easier today for parents to become more like the society in which we live than in the past. We are subtly and constantly influenced to accept wrong as right and even acceptable. As a result, society has slowly lowered the bar on modesty, morality, chastity, and self-respect.

Many parents don’t try to fight these influences because they assume their kids will figure it out on their own; after all, they did. The problem with this philosophy is that society is NOT like it was when they were teens. Without the training and developing weapons of their own to fight this battle, they WILL become casualties of this war.

I realize that parents do not only fight the influences of society but they fight peer pressure as well, which is very strong. I also realize that kids will do what they are going to do, even if it is against their upbringing, in order to be accepted by their peers. In addition, I understand that children today are being eaten alive by the unhealthy influences of our day. It’s no wonder our children are confused about their sexuality and who they ought to be.

Parents Must Teach Correct Principles

Parents, please, if you have been lax in your parental responsibilities or you feel inadequate to fight this battle, do whatever it takes to arm yourselves and your children with better tools to win this war. Whether you like it or not and whether or not you are prepared for it, you and your children have been drawn into this fight by society.

Proper training has to start in the home first, by example and teaching the principles that make them happy. They need a good understanding about what they are up against and the battle they must fight before they can develop the tools they need to be happy and safe from the  deep pits and potholes of life. If they don’t understand the enemy and the tools he or she uses, then how will they know when they are being assaulted until they become victims?

I know one thing for sure, that we must be as bold as the enemy in presenting alternative lifestyles choices to our children than society gives them. We have to teach them through example and give them a reason to fight such an enticing enemy. The enemy is VERY strong and the consequences are very unpleasant for them if they fall victim. They need to know, as much as possible, how to resist the enemy and how to develop their own armor that protects them from choosing a pathway that leads to unpleasant consequences that may affect them all their lives.

Never make children feel that they are unacceptable to you, just their behavior. Let them know that you offer them UNCONDITIONAL love. If they know they are loved, then you empower them to come back to their upbringing and feel free to discuss things with you that they may otherwise be afraid to discuss. The last thing you want is for them to get their information elsewhere or become pregnant and try to deal with it on their own. They must never question your love for them, but they need to know what behavior is unacceptable in your home.

I Too Have Taken Up The Challenge

All of these things are reasons for why I have taken it upon myself to write about these things. I want to help parents and teens see that there are alternatives to doing what they know in their souls are wrong. Many of them have already lost their ability to fight against the onslaught against them. I want them to know that the battle may have been lost but the war is not over.

Some of you may have already become a victim but you can become free of your situation if you are willing to make changes in your life. Allow me to help you. Know that anything you say is between you and me, unless you want me to share your story. For private communications, send me an email to and give me an address where you can receive private communications.

I ask you parents to please allow your teens and tweens to go to my sites, which is always G-rated. They can see for themselves that it is cool to be informed and to not participate in activities their peers are doing. Let me tell them why it is important to be modest and wait for sex until marriage.

You can do your best to educate your children, but it’s likely that they will listen to me and others before they listen to you. It is just part of their internal makeup in order for them to grow up and become their own individual. It’s true that your relationship with them is vital and that they know they can trust you for advice, I know the reason I made some of the right choices as a teen is because I didn’t want to disappoint my parents, but some kids just won’t listen to their parents. That is where I can help.

I have been a Sunday School teacher of children for over forty years, and of teens and adults for about half of that time. Teens seem to relate well to me because they know I love them unconditionally. I want you to know that you can trust me with them, so allow me to help you.

I Encourage You to Leave a Comment

Promiscuity is rampant today because society has lost its values and have no strong reasons against participating in sex in order to satisfy lust and animal urges that come naturally. My desire is to influence these values through my blogs and give you a reason to control urges and put them in their place. Any comments you have to offer will certainly add value to this quest of mine.

If you are a teen, a tween, a parent or a grandparent, please offer us your comments. Tell us how you see this situation and what you have done to arm those you love with tools to fight in this battle.

See and for my book as well.

Thanks, Judith Sherman


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