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Secrets Of A Happy Life

I Still Know Who She Is…

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80s arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00.

I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided since I wasn’t busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On examining it I saw it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors and got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while! As she is a victim of Alzheimer’s disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised and asked him, ‘And you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?’ He smiled as he patted my hand and said, ‘She doesn’t know me but I still know who she is.’

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm and thought, ‘That is the kind of love I want in my life. True love is neither physical nor romantic’. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

Peace is seeing a sunset and knowing who to thank.

The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.

I hope you share this with someone you care about, as I just did.

Life isn’t about how to survive the storm but how to dance in the rain.

The road to success is not straight.

  • There is a curve called Failure,
  • a loop called Confusion,
  • speed bumps called Friends,
  • red lights called Enemies,
  • caution lights called Family.
  • You will have flats called Jobs.
  • But, if you have a spare called Determination, an engine called Perseverance, insurance called Faith, a driver called Almighty God, you will make it to a place called Success…

I remember you!!!

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God Give Us What We Need

I received this message from a friend and I enjoyed it so much, I wanted to share it with you as well. The message is true and very special to me. Please ponder on the message and pass it on if you want. I will give you the code so you can send it to your friends.

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May God Bless you this way as well. Look for the thorns and see what God gives you.

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Why Youth Today Are Confused

  • March 25, 2010 at 1:11 pm in

We do our youth a great injustice when we neglect to teach them that their outside appearance does not represent who they are internally. Society teaches them that, if they are not beautiful, they will get no where in life. They need to know that this is a lie and that their character is what people admire about them.

Girls nowadays will do pretty much anything to make themselves acceptable to boys. Boys don’t seem to understand that there are limits for what they should expect from girls. Of course, this behavior is not new, but what is new is the way girls try to please boys today.

We don’t just have girls giving away chastity to be popular, we have them doing things that no child or teen should be doing. Not only do they give away sex, but they participate in parties like none I ever attended. Even in restrooms at school, they are caught doing things we wouldn’t dream of when I was a teen.

Why Are We Surprised?

We may be appalled by the behavior of our society today.  We may also be very surprised by the degree of it!  Did we not teach our children the right way to show love and how to give boys proper attention? Perhaps we just assume that they understand and then act surprised (even shocked) when they do some of the things we see them do?

If we didn’t teach them the values, limits, and boundaries that sex carries with it, and we didn’t teach them by our examples, then what else can we expect from them? Often, we leave that duty up to the churches and schools, even though the schools and churches have fallen down on this responsibility…just as we parents have fallen down on our duties to teach children.

Parents Face An Uphill Battle

We may be responsible parents and teach our children correctly but they still fall victim to society.  Children become victims because they were not strong enough to resist the compelling influences that besiege them. Also, they may not fully understand that this is a war for their right to be happy and to be safe from the harmful repercussions that follow life’s challenges.

Parents today are fighting an uphill battle as well and so our children often become products of society’s ungodly influences. The way I see it, children either have not been taught the boundaries of healthy sex or they become part of a sick society because they are not surrounded by healthy influences or developed the tools they need to succesfully fight these influences.

It is easier today for parents to become more like the society in which we live than in the past. We are subtly and constantly influenced to accept wrong as right and even acceptable. As a result, society has slowly lowered the bar on modesty, morality, chastity, and self-respect.

Many parents don’t try to fight these influences because they assume their kids will figure it out on their own; after all, they did. The problem with this philosophy is that society is NOT like it was when they were teens. Without the training and developing weapons of their own to fight this battle, they WILL become casualties of this war.

I realize that parents do not only fight the influences of society but they fight peer pressure as well, which is very strong. I also realize that kids will do what they are going to do, even if it is against their upbringing, in order to be accepted by their peers. In addition, I understand that children today are being eaten alive by the unhealthy influences of our day. It’s no wonder our children are confused about their sexuality and who they ought to be.

Parents Must Teach Correct Principles

Parents, please, if you have been lax in your parental responsibilities or you feel inadequate to fight this battle, do whatever it takes to arm yourselves and your children with better tools to win this war. Whether you like it or not and whether or not you are prepared for it, you and your children have been drawn into this fight by society.

Proper training has to start in the home first, by example and teaching the principles that make them happy. They need a good understanding about what they are up against and the battle they must fight before they can develop the tools they need to be happy and safe from the  deep pits and potholes of life. If they don’t understand the enemy and the tools he or she uses, then how will they know when they are being assaulted until they become victims?

I know one thing for sure, that we must be as bold as the enemy in presenting alternative lifestyles choices to our children than society gives them. We have to teach them through example and give them a reason to fight such an enticing enemy. The enemy is VERY strong and the consequences are very unpleasant for them if they fall victim. They need to know, as much as possible, how to resist the enemy and how to develop their own armor that protects them from choosing a pathway that leads to unpleasant consequences that may affect them all their lives.

Never make children feel that they are unacceptable to you, just their behavior. Let them know that you offer them UNCONDITIONAL love. If they know they are loved, then you empower them to come back to their upbringing and feel free to discuss things with you that they may otherwise be afraid to discuss. The last thing you want is for them to get their information elsewhere or become pregnant and try to deal with it on their own. They must never question your love for them, but they need to know what behavior is unacceptable in your home.

I Too Have Taken Up The Challenge

All of these things are reasons for why I have taken it upon myself to write about these things. I want to help parents and teens see that there are alternatives to doing what they know in their souls are wrong. Many of them have already lost their ability to fight against the onslaught against them. I want them to know that the battle may have been lost but the war is not over.

Some of you may have already become a victim but you can become free of your situation if you are willing to make changes in your life. Allow me to help you. Know that anything you say is between you and me, unless you want me to share your story. For private communications, send me an email to JudithLSherman@yahoo.com and give me an address where you can receive private communications.

I ask you parents to please allow your teens and tweens to go to my sites, which is always G-rated. They can see for themselves that it is cool to be informed and to not participate in activities their peers are doing. Let me tell them why it is important to be modest and wait for sex until marriage.

You can do your best to educate your children, but it’s likely that they will listen to me and others before they listen to you. It is just part of their internal makeup in order for them to grow up and become their own individual. It’s true that your relationship with them is vital and that they know they can trust you for advice, I know the reason I made some of the right choices as a teen is because I didn’t want to disappoint my parents, but some kids just won’t listen to their parents. That is where I can help.

I have been a Sunday School teacher of children for over forty years, and of teens and adults for about half of that time. Teens seem to relate well to me because they know I love them unconditionally. I want you to know that you can trust me with them, so allow me to help you.

I Encourage You to Leave a Comment

Promiscuity is rampant today because society has lost its values and have no strong reasons against participating in sex in order to satisfy lust and animal urges that come naturally. My desire is to influence these values through my blogs and give you a reason to control urges and put them in their place. Any comments you have to offer will certainly add value to this quest of mine.

If you are a teen, a tween, a parent or a grandparent, please offer us your comments. Tell us how you see this situation and what you have done to arm those you love with tools to fight in this battle.

See SexWhatAboutIt.com and amazon.com for my book as well.

Thanks, Judith Sherman

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Beauty Only Skin Deep

As a teen, I came in 8th place out of 25,000 in the Miss Teenage San Francisco Pageant. Also, I was a Wendy Ward Girl and modeled clothing for Montgomery Wards, and a Model for Mc Calls (where I modeled with Sally Fields in San Francisco when she was 17 years old). In addition, I was a Pacesetter and wore new trends of clothing to school at my High School – for example, the hip-hugger skirt and pants. In other words, I was pleasing to the eye as a teenager.

As the years passed and I grew older, I still had a degree of natural beauty but felt ugly because of my weight. I could not understand why men would still look at me and flirt when I was so overweight. I wore a size 18 then and that seemed fat to me; it’s too bad that I can’t fit into size 18 now. Illness, car accidents, injuries, child bearing, and age all have had a toll on me, so I felt even uglier.

At sixty-one years old, I still get a lot of invites from men on social sites. They are always telling me how beautiful I am and how my blue eyes and smile make them happy.  I used to think all of it was just flattery so that I would accept them as a friend; I am sure that is probably true in most cases. However, even when I try to tell them I am heavy and have gray hair now, they won’t recant their admiration. I thought that was strange of them because I am not sexy at all.

Why were men (young and old) still aggressively flirting with me? I didn’t get it until I began to understand the message of frosting on a cake. I realize now that I am very different than most women today, and so men are drawn to me because they see that I am different.

Then my brother (who was single at the time) complained about women today. He said they are shallow, few of them have moral standards, and many of them act like female dogs in heat. As we talked more, the concept for this site and book  (“More Than Frosting©”) was born. It seems obvious that this type of book and site have a place today. (Note: the book “More Than Frosting©” is still being written and should be released before Christmas.)

I worked in a glass manufacturing plant in the nineteen seventies, and noticed the beautiful women who worked there. I also noticed they wore nice clothing and shoes, had perfect nails and hair, and their makeup and cologne were expensive. This observation caused me to consider how much money they must spend on themselves and how much they have left to spend on their families?  No wonder they have to continue working, I thought. They need to keep up with their expensive lifestyle.

Am I being condescending and judgmental about my appraisal of these beautiful women? Perhaps so, and perhaps not; it is not for us to decide. The point is that we may be beautiful on the outside and yet, what is on the inside may be anything but beautiful.

Some beautiful people are just plain beautiful inside and out, and just plain sweet. I am not talking about these type of people, we all know who they are and we like being around these people. What I am talking about are those who appear to be all frosting with not much inside to make them lovely throughout.

I hope this is the type of person that I am now; I believe that I am.  However, one thing I do know is that, in many ways, I am very different from most women. I also know that I am different because I make an effort to be different. I want to be a good person, and to be one with whom my Father In Heaven will be pleased. I would hope this will be your goal as well.

I welcome your comments on this subject.

 

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Love


~ Pass It On ~

Someone taught you how to love,

and probably didn’t know it,

and in return, with every day,

it’s now you’re turn to show it.


When you love, you give a gift,

and when you’re gone it stays,

to be passed on by the ones you loved,

to make someone else’s day.


So remember someone who loved you,

and show how much you care,

by sharing all the love they gave,

with people everywhere.

When you give away your love,

that doesn’t mean it’s gone.

Love will last forever, so open up your heart and pass your love on.


Sex, What About It at amazon.com

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Friendships Are More Than Frosting

Listen to the lyrics and think about how the video applies to friendship being more than frosting.

We are all different and have different points of view. It doesn’t matter how different we are because friends have something in common, being there when they are needed. It doesn’t matter if the friend is black or white, brown, yellow or red. Gee, I guess they can even be green. All that matters is who they are inside. Isn’t that what more than frosting is all about?

I hope the words to this video stays in your mind for a long time and reminds you of how we need to look past the outside cover of a person and love what is inside them.


Sex, What About It at amazon.com

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Sex, What About It?

  • March 13, 2010 at 1:22 am in

New Postings.

I just posted articles on http://SexWhatAboutIt.com: Don’t worry, all articles are G-rated. I hope you will stop by the site and read my postings in the future. I think you will appreciate the messages.

Sex, What About It at amazon.com


Celibacy Is Wierd

POSTED BY JUDITH SHERMAN ON MAR 18, 2010

Suppose a man waits for sex until it’s under the covenants of marriage. Yet, women think he is weird for dating without having sexual encounters. Worse, women won’t date or marry a man who isn’t experienced. Now he is frustrated because women don’t appreciate celibacy and fidelity. Sexual gratification is the driving force behind dating and relationships. God created men and women this way for a reason, to have sex. This is why people think doing what is natural and feels right cannot be wrong. Therefore, pursuing sexual encounters is justified and waiting is silly. Society doesn’t recognize waiting for sex as admirable. …

Sex, What About It at amazon.com


Smudging The Lines

POSTED BY JUDITH SHERMAN ON MAR 18, 2010

Some people abuse sex, and they do things their creator never intended for them to do. They play with it as if it’s a cheap toy, showing little or no respect for its powers or valuing the boundaries that God has placed on its use. Sometimes a spouse smudges the lines that keep sex within the bounds of their commitment to each other.

Sex, What About It at amazon.com


POSTED BY JUDITH SHERMAN ON MAR 13, 2010

Some children are taught that sex is bad, that those who do it without being married are nasty and will go to hell, and that sex is something they should not talk about with their parents because it is embarrassing. Other children are taught that sex is a gift from God and that it is to be reserved for marriage. Children are …

Sex, What About It at amazon.com


Fidelity

POSTED BY JUDITH SHERMAN ON MAR 13, 2010

 Fidelity? What Is It And Why Is It Important? Let me tell you what I know about fidelity in a relationship and then you decide what is best for you and for your relationships. First, determine if you and your mate understand fidelity, monogamy, and responsibility as an adult and being a member of a household. Second, decide what is best for you and …

Sex, What About It at amazon.com


What is Sex?

POSTED BY JUDITH SHERMAN ON MAR 2, 2010

The human body is a marvelous work and wonder, with the innate ability to procreate in order to preserve the species. As such, the body provides the exquisite pleasure of sex that bonds a man and woman together, especially in trying times. Sex provides the special glue that helps keep marriages together, in sickness and health, in prosperity and want, …

Sex, What About It at amazon.com

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It’s More About The Cake Than Frosting

More Then Frosting

Which cake would you want to bite into?

Take a look at these two cakes. One looks delicious and very enticing. The other cake sits in an ugly pot, it has no frosting, and it does not appear to be tasty.  However, the ugly cake is actually moist and the most delicious.

People are similar to these cakes.

Some of us spend a lot of time and money on making ourselves look good, smell good, and feel good. Even with all the toys and extras that embellish our lives, even when we’ve been endowed with the right attributes to be appealing to others, we may still be internally undesirable and bland.

As we discovered with cakes, our external appearance may be attractive sexually but we lack important attributes that make us pleasing on the inside. The frosting and trimmings may look luscious but there is nothing more to our character than too much sugar.

We need to be the type of person that people want to be around because we make them feel better. People need to know that they can trust us with their inner fears and the precious desires of their hearts. We can be the soft place to fall when someone hurts or their our spirit aches from the hardships of life.

Unfortunately, society teaches us that we need to be the beautiful cake in order to be acceptable to others.  Nothing can be further from the truth.  For example, my friend was no’t good looking, perhaps even ugly, but he always had tons of girls around him.  He was fun to be around and was good to his dates. I loved dancing with him friends when specific songs came on because he was so much fun to dance with.  He was my buddy.

Sex, What About It at amazon.com

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